Rashida Wright

Photo: Courtesy of Ales Krivec -Unsplash

Forgiveness: From Others and From Yourself

The songwriter was really on to something when they released the song “If I Could Turn Back Time”. Maybe it’s just me, but the older I get, the more and more I realize there is not a “re-do” button in life. Maybe it’s because I am beginning to truly grasp how little time we have on Earth. Maybe it’s because I have made quite a few mistakes that I just wish I could go back and change. But unfortunately there is not. You can’t unhurt those who you harmed, you can’t take back words you said, you can’t undo actions that changed the course of your life. But what you can do is apologize and mean it. You can learn from them, you can do your best to lean on God to help you not make them again, and you can forgive yourself for what you did. I’m more so writing this to myself, so I’m not trying to preach to you. But it’s ok to say, I messed up, I really messed up, but I am growing. I am a human being who is learning, and I’m sorry. Make amends with those who you need to make amends with. Don’t forgo accountability, blaming others for your wrongs. But also, forgive you and let go of what cannot be changed.

Give Yourself Grace

“So, if the creator of the universe, Jesus Christ, can forgive us, why can’t we forgive ourselves?”

Once a week (for the most part) for the last 3 months, I have been helping to speak to others about Jesus and other spiritual matters. Just a couple of hours a week. And one thing I’ve noticed is that many of us have trouble forgiving ourselves, me included. We replay the situation over and over again, we keep holding ourselves to the fire and believing that we can’t be forgiven for what we did. The beautiful thing about God, about Jesus Christ of Nazareth, is that He does forgive. If we are truly sorry and turning away from the sin we did, He will forgive us. So, if the creator of the universe, Jesus Christ, can forgive us, why can’t we forgive ourselves? Sometimes, I think what’s really happening is a form a pride. We have held ourselves to such a high standard, and in such high esteem, that when we fall, it is hard to believe that we actually did what we did. But the Jeremiah 17:9 is clear. “The heart is deceitful above all things, and desperately sick; who can understand it?” We are capable of wrong and in our human bodies we are prone to sinning. Our mistakes, our wrongs, our sins are bad and can leave a stain on our lives, but the graciousness of God is amazing in that He can and will take those mistakes and make them into something He can use for His glory.

“However, God used that same testimony when I was chatting with someone this week to bring her to Him.”

Romans 8:28

A few years ago, I went through a break-up that crushed me in ways I didn’t expect. Shortly after the break-up, I started getting tarot card reading videos on my YouTube feed and I started watching them. And it got addicting. I needed it to start my day, I needed to hear it during the day, and I watched it when I got home from work. I felt like it was the only way I could get clarity on what was happening in my life. Furthermore, I have to be honest, I didn’t feel right doing it, but I couldn’t stop. Eventually, through answered prayers by God, I stopped watching the readings and put away horoscopes in general for good. I always felt extremely dumb for even going that route when God is clear in His word and through the leading of the Holy Spirit. I was actually embarrassed and slightly ashamed because it could have been a great opportunity to lean on God through the process of healing. However, God used that same testimony when I was chatting with someone this week to bring her to Him. It was unreal how similar our stories were when we were talking about how the videos came about. Once we give our life to Christ, it is no longer our own which means He can and will take all that is in our lives, the good and the bad and turn it to good for His glory, if we let Him. And He means that. So if you’re reading this and feel like you messed up so bad that you don’t ever think you can grow past it, I want to tell you, you will. It may not turn out how you want, and you definitely can’t turn back the hands of time, but He will absolutely turn it into something that is useful and that brings Him glory that you can be unashamed of later. There is good in that mistake, there is good coming from that shortcoming. All you have to do is repent, actively let Him do His work and be patient. He will heal and restore, just as He said He would in His word.

With Love,

❤️

Rashida